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Things Will Happen When They’re Meant To

Lately, I’ve been reminding myself of a phrase that feels simple but profound: “Las cosas van a salir cuando tengan que salir.”

In English, it means, “Things will happen when they’re meant to happen.”

I’ve been holding on to it like a quiet mantra — especially on the days when my to-do list feels endless. Between work responsibilities, PhD deadlines, family matters, and personal goals that always seem to move to “next week,” it’s easy to feel like I’m constantly behind. Yet, this phrase reminds me to breathe, to trust that not everything has to happen right now, and that timing — real timing — has a rhythm of its own.

We live in a culture that celebrates control, planning, and productivity. I’m someone who loves structure and progress, but I’ve also learned that not everything can be forced. There’s a point where pushing harder doesn’t help — it only drains you. Some things need time to unfold, and others simply need you to be ready for them.

Philosophically, this idea isn’t new. The Stoics spoke about focusing on what’s within our control and letting go of what isn’t. Aristotle taught about balance — what he called the Golden Mean — the virtuous midpoint between excess and deficiency. It’s the art of doing not too much, not too little, but just enough. And the ancient Greeks also had two words for time: chronos and kairos.

Chronos is the time we measure — the quantitative kind. It’s the hours, days, and deadlines that structure our lives. It’s the calendar reminders, project plans, and submission dates. Chronos is linear, logical, and necessary — it keeps us moving and helps us make progress.

But kairos is different. Kairos is qualitative. It’s not about the clock — it’s about the moment. It’s the right, opportune, or meaningful time — the moment when something feels ready, when everything aligns. Kairos can’t be scheduled; it’s sensed. It’s when an idea suddenly clicks, when healing finally begins, when clarity appears after weeks of uncertainty.

I think a lot of our stress comes from trying to live only in chronos, while life often unfolds in kairos. We measure our progress by tasks completed, but we rarely give space for the kind of progress that can’t be tracked — emotional, intellectual, or spiritual growth.

This idea has shown up in my life in many ways. During my PhD, I’ve learned that insights don’t arrive on command; they come when I’m ready to understand them. In my personal life, especially after my dad passed away, I’ve realized that grief, healing, and even joy follow their own timeline. You can’t rush them. You can only stay open to them.

So I keep reminding myself: things will happen when they’re meant to happen. Not as an excuse to procrastinate, but as a reminder to trust the process — to do my part with integrity and let life take care of the rest.

Maybe the point isn’t to control time, but to live wisely within it — to work with chronos while staying open to kairos. Because the most meaningful things rarely arrive on schedule. They arrive when we’re finally ready for them.

When Life Feels Upside Down: Lessons in Real Well-Being

When life is steady, well-being feels like a checklist: sleep enough, move your body, eat well, take your supplements.

But when everything turns upside down—when you’re grieving, overwhelmed, stretched thin—that’s when the real lessons come through.

The last few months have been some of the hardest I’ve had in a long time. I lost my grandmother. Then, a few months later, I lost my father.

I’ve been balancing multiple projects at work, in the middle of a PhD, and somehow trying to show up as a leader, a student, a sister, a daughter, a friend… all while still taking care of myself.

Here’s what I’ve learned (and am still learning) about well-being—not the Instagram version, but the quiet, raw, deeply personal kind:

1. Grief Doesn’t Ask for Permission

Grief doesn’t wait for the weekend. It shows up in between meetings and to-do lists.

In my case, both phone calls came on Mondays—one just as I was starting my workday, the other at night, while I was in the middle of a PhD class.

Even though I knew those calls could arrive at any moment, when they finally came, they still shocked me.

Nothing could have prepared me to receive them.

Grief is deeply personal; each of us experiences it in a different way.

I’ve learned to let it in, even if just for a moment—a deep breath, a memory, a tear.

I don’t push it away. I try not to judge it.

2. Self-Care Becomes Survival

Self-care has become as simple as drinking water and eating.

Sitting in silence for five minutes. Taking a few days off from work and classes. Going out for a walk.

These tiny acts have become my anchors—small reminders that I’m still here.

3. People Are the Pillars

During these months, I’ve leaned on people more than ever. Friends, family, professors, other PhD students, and coworkers have been there in many different ways.

Sometimes a simple “I’m sorry to hear that” went a long way.

Well-being isn’t a solo mission—it’s collective.

We heal in community, even if the gestures are small.

4. Permission to Pause

One powerful thing I gave myself: permission to do less.

To postpone a task. To take longer walks. To cry during a break.

To spend more time with my family and truly be present.

Sometimes I feel like I spend most of my life thinking and doing.

Now, I’m learning to take time to feel and just be.

Productivity can wait. Healing can’t.

5. It’s Okay Not to Feel “Okay”

I’ve stopped pretending everything is fine.

And strangely, that honesty made me feel more grounded.

There’s peace in truth.

And there’s strength in vulnerability.

Closing Thoughts

These months have reminded me that well-being isn’t about perfection—it’s about compassion.

It’s about creating space for all parts of life: the joy, the sorrow, the chaos, the calm.

And learning, little by little, that I can carry both.

The Digital Toolkit Powering My PhD Journey

Pursuing a PhD is an exciting intellectual adventure—but it’s also a juggling act of reading, writing, organizing, analyzing, and staying sane. Over time, I’ve discovered a set of tools and apps that support my research, writing, and well-being. In this post, I want to share what’s currently in my digital toolbox and how each tool helps me stay focused, productive, and balanced.

1. Writing and Note-Taking

Scrivener (currently testing my workflow with this app)

When I started the PhD program, I used Microsoft Word to write my thesis. But I quickly realized how difficult it was to navigate long documents and connect ideas effectively.

That’s why I’ve switched to Scrivener for now. Configuring the settings took some effort to ensure the formatting was right, but navigating and organizing my thesis has been much easier since switching. I love its flexibility and how it allows me to organize chapters, sections, and notes in one place.

Obsidian / Notion

This is where I take notes from readings, lectures, and meetings. The ability to link ideas and organize them visually has helped me create meaningful connections in my research.

2. Reference and Knowledge Management

Zotero

An essential tool for managing references, saving articles, and creating citations with ease. I use it to store academic papers and generate bibliographies without stress.

NotebookLM

This has become one of my favorite tools for working with long PDFs and documents. I can upload research articles or lecture notes and ask NotebookLM questions about the content. It’s like having an AI-powered research assistant that helps me analyze, summarize, and extract insights from dense material.

ChatGPT / Perplexity

These tools help me brainstorm, outline ideas, and explore new perspectives on my research topics. ChatGPT clarifies my thinking through guided questions and reflections, while Perplexity is great for quickly summarizing complex subjects or finding academic sources. They’ve both become essential for making progress when I feel stuck or want to explore something from a fresh angle.

Claude / Gamma

For creating presentations and visual storytelling, I’ve been using Claude to help me draft compelling slide content with clarity and structure. I’ll soon be trying Gamma as well, which promises a beautiful and intuitive design experience for modern presentations. These tools help me bring my ideas to life visually for class presentations.

Mapify

Mapify has been a powerful tool for organizing my thinking and planning across different dimensions of my PhD. I use it to create interactive maps that help me visually structure my ideas, understand topics from various courses, and track research themes across time. It’s particularly useful for strategic thinking.

3. Task and Project Management

Google Calendar / Outlook Calendar

My schedule lives here. I block focused work sessions, deadlines, meetings, and even breaks—because rest is also part of the process.

4. Reading and Summarizing

Recall

When I want to extract insights from lectures, interviews, or YouTube videos, I use Recall. It summarizes video content clearly and concisely, allowing me to focus on key points without spending hours rewatching.

Speechify

When I’m tired of staring at a screen or want to absorb readings while walking or doing chores, I turn to Speechify. It turns articles, PDFs, and even my own notes into audio, allowing me to continue learning on the go. It’s a game-changer for multitasking and reducing screen fatigue.

Notta

Notta is a transcription tool I’ve recently added to my workflow. I use it to transcribe classes. Its accuracy and multilingual support make it a great tool especially when I want a clean and editable transcript to reference or quote in my research.

5. Self-Care and Focus

Lifestack

It helps me design my day with intention by tracking habits, managing energy levels, and keeping me aligned with my priorities throughout the day.

Rize

I’ve also been using Rize, an intelligent time-tracking app that gives me detailed feedback on how I spend my time, helping me improve focus and reduce distractions throughout the day.

My PhD journey is supported not just by knowledge and discipline, but by tools that make the process smoother and more enjoyable. These apps help me create structure, reduce overwhelm, and focus on what matters most: learning and contributing something meaningful. If you’re on a similar path, I hope this list helps you discover something useful for your own workflow.

The Strength Formula: Redefining Success from the Inside Out

What if success wasn’t about speed, hustle, or constant achievement?

What if, instead, success was a quiet, deliberate unfolding — a path walked with clarity, depth, and strength?

Over time, and through deep reflection, I’ve come to realize that success is not a singular event. It’s not a promotion, a number on a scale, or a round of applause. It’s the result of a process — an inner architecture built through daily choices, mindset, and values.

I call it: The Strength Formula.

Success = Self Awareness + Prioritization + Focus + Consistency + Patience + Slow + Curiosity + Flexibility + Courage ⇒ Strength

Each component plays a vital role — and together, they don’t just lead to success.

They become the very definition of it.

🔹 Self-Awareness

Everything begins here. Without knowing yourself — your values, limits, needs — it’s easy to chase someone else’s version of success. Self-awareness is the compass.

🔹 Prioritization

You can’t do it all, and you shouldn’t try. Prioritization is how you honor your energy, time, and vision. It’s not about saying “no” to everything — it’s about saying a resounding “yes” to what matters.

🔹 Focus

The art of being fully present. Focus turns scattered effort into meaningful progress. It’s what helps you go deep instead of wide — and deep is where growth lives.

🔹 Consistency

Not glamorous, but essential. Consistency turns sparks into fire. When you show up — especially when you don’t feel like it — you’re quietly becoming unstoppable.

🔹 Slow (Deliberate Action)

This one matters deeply to me. I separated slow from patience because slow still implies action — but it’s deliberate, thoughtful, intentional. In a world that rewards urgency, slow is a rebellion. It says: “I’m here for the long run.”

🔹 Patience (Stillness in Time)

Patience, on the other hand, is stillness. It’s the quiet strength of waiting, trusting, allowing things to unfold. It’s resting when needed. It’s knowing that some progress is invisible until it blooms.

🔹 Curiosity

Curiosity turns obstacles into questions. It keeps the journey playful. It’s the opposite of ego — curiosity is humble, open, and always willing to learn.

🔹 Flexibility

Because life will never go exactly as planned. Flexibility is how you adjust without losing your core. It’s strength in motion — like bamboo in the wind.

🔹 Courage

The glue. Courage is needed to start, to keep going, to speak up, to rest, to pivot. Without it, none of the above take root. It’s the quiet power to choose growth, even when it’s uncomfortable.

💪 Why Strength?

Because success without strength is fragile.

And strength — true, rooted, resilient strength — comes from living these values day by day. Mental strength, emotional strength, physical strength… they’re all connected.

This isn’t a formula for achieving more. It’s a formula for becoming more.

📝 Reflection

If this formula resonates with you, try asking yourself:

Where in this formula am I already strong?
Which part needs more attention right now?
What would happen if I lived this formula, one day at a time?

You don’t have to do it all perfectly. Just consistently. Just slowly. With curiosity, flexibility, and courage.

That’s how strength is built. That’s how success begins.

The Two Paths of Learning: Training and Observation

We’re always learning—whether we realize it or not. But not all learning happens the same way. Some lessons come from structured instruction; others sneak in quietly through observation. As I reflect on my own journey—through leadership, academia, and personal growth—I’ve come to see these two paths as essential, complementary, and powerful in different ways.

1. Learning by Training: The Power of Structure

This is the kind of learning we associate with classrooms, certifications, online courses, or coaching. It’s formal, deliberate, and often efficient. You’re taught the steps, the why behind them, and the expected outcomes. It’s the world of frameworks, blueprints, and best practices.

I’ve relied on this kind of learning many times—when preparing for a new role, earning a certification, or diving into a new field. It gives clarity and accelerates mastery. But it has its limits. Training can tell you what to do and how to do it, but it doesn’t always show you when to apply it, or why it matters on a human level.

2. Learning by Observation: The Art of Absorption

Then there’s the quieter kind of learning—the one that happens when no one is officially teaching. You learn by watching how a colleague handles conflict, how a mentor speaks in meetings, or how a friend responds to challenge. This path is slower, less predictable, but often deeper.

I’ve learned some of the most important lessons in leadership and life simply by observing others. How someone listens. How they remain calm in chaos. How they navigate ambiguity with grace. These lessons can’t be taught in a slide deck. They must be witnessed.

And sometimes, the most impactful observations are those that teach us how not to act.

There have been moments where watching someone interrupt, dismiss, or act from ego made something crystal clear: I don’t want to be like that. These moments can be just as formative as witnessing excellence. They sharpen our values and guide our choices, often more powerfully than a textbook ever could.

The Dance Between the Two

Neither path is better—they work best together. Training gives us a foundation. Observation gives us nuance. One gives us the map; the other helps us read the terrain. Together, they build not only knowledge but also wisdom.

As Aristotle might say, we don’t just learn by knowing—we learn by doing, imitating, and reflecting. He explores these key philosophical ideas about learning and knowledge in his works, particularly the Nicomachean Ethics and Poetics.

A Question to Reflect On

Where in your life are you relying too much on training and not enough on observation? Or vice versa?

Sometimes the next lesson is right in front of us—quietly unfolding in someone else’s actions, or reactions.